intimateaff3ction:

hacheload:

durbikins:

For the past two days, this little dinosaur has been hitchhiking on my side mirror.image

And every time I go back to my car, he’s just chilling on top of the mirror, ready to go.

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The dude’s hella confused though. He sees himself in the mirror and tries to attract himself to himself

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And sometimes it looks like he fell off …

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nope!

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ADVENTURES OF CAR DINOSAUR

cherish him forever

(via blujayonthewing)

slutdust:

Remember when they used to say that gay marriage ruins the sanctity of the institution?

slutdust:

Remember when they used to say that gay marriage ruins the sanctity of the institution?

(via blujayonthewing)

strangelyobsessedwithstuff:

vialsofbrightforgettingpowders:

ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD
THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS

YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN
SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.

NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE.
NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING

NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE

GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED

IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGESthanks for the tip karkat

strangelyobsessedwithstuff:

vialsofbrightforgettingpowders:

ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD

THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS

YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN

SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.

NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE.

NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING

NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE

GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED

IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGES
thanks for the tip karkat

(via least-virginy-virgin-ever)

toughlife-strongheart:

Neil Hilborn. Amazing.

(via joodleeatsrainbows)

supremebeyonce:

twerkynacho:

twerkynacho:

dreamwurks:

the-babe:

cumdoodle:

Nash Grier compilation of comebacks

"he probably shaves her arms while she sleeps"

mandatory update:

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these are the best

but wait there’s more

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don’t stop this is great 

He’s such an imbecile.

(via tales-of-a-clutsy-ninja)

prepare-for-stupid:

dontyouwannadance:

Yo its’ okay if you’re a white girl who likes Uggs and spray tans and pop music and instagramming your Starbucks. Don’t let tumblr make you think for one minute that liking things like that makes you inferior.

Same goes for if you’re a hipster trans mexican/japanese Pizza Underground enthusiast with a hello kitty neck tattoo.

If you’re not hurting anyone, you be you. There’s nothing wrong with that.

PRAISE

(via hellotaterbug)

theelectrictalesofcharizard:

idopostmortems:

askarsenickatnep:

futrmrssnape:

itsdaisyhater:

you must reblog every sunday

Reblogging, Just because it’s sunday

Three minutes past. I could’ve avoided this lul.

It is Sunday. Therefore, it is relevant.

every sunday

theelectrictalesofcharizard:

idopostmortems:

askarsenickatnep:

futrmrssnape:

itsdaisyhater:

you must reblog every sunday

Reblogging, Just because it’s sunday

Three minutes past. I could’ve avoided this lul.

It is Sunday. Therefore, it is relevant.

every sunday

(via sheeplands)

phils-mum-and-llama-placentas:

bangtidyniall:

I HEAR THOSE SLEIGH BELLS JINGLING

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RING TING TINGLING TOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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COME ON IT’S LOVELY WEATHER

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FOR A SLEIGH RIDE TOGETHER WITH YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

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IT’S STARTED

(via hellotaterbug)

socialismartnature:

Dr. George Tiller

socialismartnature:

Dr. George Tiller

(via thatattitude)

kanrose:

YO READ THIS GODDAMNED THING BECAUSE FLIP IS SO GOSH DARNED TALENTED WITH COLOURS N SHIT AND SHE HAS BEEN FOR THE 3 YEARS I’VE KNOWN HER

(via coolmyassholereturns)

thegiftxthecurse:

A note from Tupac Shakur’s prom date. ‘96
“I had wrote a letter saying how much I loved his music to his fan club. At the end I made a joke saying that if he ever read this letter to please take me to my prom since my boyfriend had just broken up with me. About a month later there was a knock at my door and it was him! He was by himself. No reporters, no homies, just Tupac Shakur at my doorstep. He came in and talked to me and my mom and my brother for about fifteen minutes and asked me if I had gotten a dress yet. I said no and he said he would take care of it and gave me $1500 in all hundred dollar bills and told me to get something pretty. Prom day came and he called and said to be ready. A limo showed up with 2Pac in it and went straight to my prom. Everyone was going crazy taking pictures but we hung out there for about thirty minutes. We danced to about five songs then he said he had business to take care of kissed me on the cheek and left. I think the world lost a great person when 2Pac was killed and I will always remember his kindness.”

thegiftxthecurse:

A note from Tupac Shakur’s prom date. ‘96

“I had wrote a letter saying how much I loved his music to his fan club. At the end I made a joke saying that if he ever read this letter to please take me to my prom since my boyfriend had just broken up with me. About a month later there was a knock at my door and it was him! He was by himself. No reporters, no homies, just Tupac Shakur at my doorstep. He came in and talked to me and my mom and my brother for about fifteen minutes and asked me if I had gotten a dress yet. I said no and he said he would take care of it and gave me $1500 in all hundred dollar bills and told me to get something pretty. Prom day came and he called and said to be ready. A limo showed up with 2Pac in it and went straight to my prom. Everyone was going crazy taking pictures but we hung out there for about thirty minutes. We danced to about five songs then he said he had business to take care of kissed me on the cheek and left. I think the world lost a great person when 2Pac was killed and I will always remember his kindness.”

(via 10knotes)

mechanicbird:

eroticmirotic:

timemachineyeah:

 

I’ve said this before and I’ll point it out again - 

Menstruation is caused by change in hormonal levels to stop the creation of a uterine lining and encourage the body to flush the lining out. The body does this by lowering estrogen levels and raising testosterone. 

Or, to put it more plainly “That time of the month” is when female hormones most closely resemble male hormones. So if (cis) women aren’t suited to office at “That time of the month” then (cis) men are NEVER suited to office.

If you are a dude and don’t dig the ladies around you at their time of the month, just think! That is you all of the time. 

And, on a final note, post-menopausal (cis) women are the most hormonally stable of all human demographics. They have fewer hormonal fluctuations of anyone, meaning older women like Hilary Clinton and Elizabeth Warren would theoretically be among the least likely candidates to make an irrational decision due to hormonal fluctuations, and if we were basing our leadership decisions on hormone levels, then only women over fifty should ever be allowed to hold office. 

Reblogging hard for that last comment.

I WANTED TO SAY THIS BUT THEN SOMEONE ELSE DID and I’m damn proud.

(via bettahorse)

I talked to mann about this briefly earlier today, and while I can completely understand the view that words like “faggot” are exclusively slurs, I can’t bring myself to agree with it. As Aristotle put it, it is the mark of an educated mind to entertain a thought without accepting it. I like to hope that those of you who consider this to be a hot button issue read this post in at least the same spirit.

Point the first, forbidding a word specifically because it offends some people is an immature and poorly considered course of action. As a christian, I’m occasionally offended by things said by some of you guys openly in the channel. If I were to react to this with indignant self righteous rage, or by starting a campaign to ban discussion of things that offend me, not only would I be in the wrong, but no one would go along with it, because that is stupid. As an adult, I respect your right to say things that offend me when you aren’t speaking with intentional malice. I think that this issue should be treated in the same manner; some things offend some people. That’s okay, we’re grownups.

Point the second, “faggot” does not function exclusively as a slur. Words like macfag, newfag, oldfag, and other derivatives are perfectly acceptable modern usages of the term that have zero homophobic connotations whatsoever.

Point the third, not even use of the term in it’s connotation as a slur need be offensive. For example, my statement “censorship is for faggots” is in itself an offensive statement, but taken in context of the discussion at large is a simple use of irony to illustrate a dismissive point. Sure, you could be offended by that, I guess, but pshhht. If I call dexanote, who I’m using for this example because he’s a nice fellow who can take a joke, a gutless cock ravaged asshelmet, he won’t be offended, because he is a cool guy who knows I bear him no ill will and am just being ridiculous. If I call him a stupid faggot buttmunch curb scraping, the same principle applies even though it includes the word faggot. Context makes it inoffensive.

A_Fat_Ghost calls people niggerlipped faggots. He is a great guy, and surely no one would advocate banning him. Context is everything. If you guys were saying “people should be kicked and banned for using the word faggot to willfully insult homosexuals”, I would agree completely. You’re not saying that.

Point the fourth, it is not the place of moderators to be offended. If you find yourself reacting to user actions or making rules based on your personal emotions, you are always wrong, no matter what the issue is, because you have failed to maintain moderative objectivity and are acting with bias. Waxx is not an asshole. He is a damn fair man, and here understands the importance of treating issues with detachment. When I was an op in the channel, I enforced rules based on how I felt at the time. Now I’m not an op, because that is bad. This principle applies to every issue, including this one.

Point the fifth,

CENSORSHIP IS NOT OKAY, EVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

Never should any human being enforce a ruling that limits the free speech of another. Kicks for intentional and malacious trolling? Sure! Kicks for using a word you don’t like? Not okay. I unilaterally refuse to consider any word regardless of context a disciplinary offense and so should you.

Look. I realize offending people is a bad thing. I realize it’s unpleasant to be offended. I think we can all agree that people ought to be nicer to one another, but this is too much. By attempting to protect the interests of a group of people, you are imposing your will upon another and limiting their capacity to express themselves. That’s not acceptable.

In short, making use of the word faggot or its derivatives a punishable offense is a terrible, ignorant, stupid idea, and I do not agree with it. This applies to every other word you can think of, ever.

— pooryoric (x)